Farewell to that great lady in yellow

it's about time that i'd officially mourn.

i thought i can just let it go. that after knowing about the death of more personalities back then, and some close friends, and even relatives, one more news of someone dying can just make me go numb and not care anymore.�

but it's not. reality hits you and hits you to the core leaving you almost paralyzed.

i was at the mall today with my niece when i saw several people in yellows and seeing yellow ribbons tied around trees and lamp posts and i realize that Pres. Corazon Aquino is indeed gone. i felt like i shouldn't be at the mall in times like this. it just didn't feel right.i should be watching the news or livestreams or better yet stand in line there where she lays.

i saw myself texting friends and acquaintances to scramble for company only to find out that tickets were distributed just last night and there's nothing left already. argh!

i feel so totally frustrated at the fact that i got to line up for almost 5 hours just for an autograph of the Blue Eagles champions last year yet can't even get to view the late president now for i don't care how many more hours.�

thus i might see myself mulling and mourning in the confines of my room tomorrow, wednesday during the burial. maybe light a candle or two while watching some livestreaming on the net or broadcasts on TV, whatever. who knows i just might even get to drag myself all the way to the Manila Cathedral for the funeral mass, never mind if i can't even get in nor see her remains. i don't care. i know i just have to stop and do something.

i still have to mourn no matter how we all comfort ourselves with the idea that at least she is now in peace. i mourn because she is indeed gone, one good image of a strong woman who has encompassed so many trials and tribulations. i mourn because in a way, it is how i'd want to celebrate her life.�

i don't know her personally, well most of us don't. but as a public figure, a good figure at that she deserves at least a little of our time to just stop and salute the life she has led.